|Column nr.10 2002|
DREAM FLY CHRISTMAS
Those semi lunatic fly fishers who dream and breathe fly-fishing adventures 24/7 are a fixated peculiar breed indeed! If your fortunate enough to have one or two of these ethereal creatures residing in your domicile? I have concocted ten suggestions geared toward making this holiday season one to truly remember
2002 FLY ADVENTURE RECAP
The United States has been through an unbelievable ordeal this year to say the least. Myself and other maniac fly fishers have not let the current chaos affect our travel plans other then longer airport waits. Now more then ever peaceful pursuits like ours feel more necessary as the civilized world strives to sort this mess out. I have traveled far and wide in pursuit of quality waters including the HOH Rainforest in Washington State where Bill Sperry and Gordy Gracey were excellent hosts. I love that splendid green sportsmens paradise. The Infamous Wilson Brothers John & Dave in Lake Marie Alaska were the best in putting me on countless serious game fish from Chums to Silver Salmon. Lake Marie Alaska an honest world-class operation on every level. Cindy Garrisons ongoing Botswana Africa fly adventures have set a new benchmark for the sport.
In the next year Cindy and I will work together to continue creating a unique fly-fishing experience. I will work many sports shows with Cindy. Cindy and I have also created an event deemed "Cindy & Dans Single Fly Celebrity Invitational Pro Am" to be held in the summer of 2003. More details to follow as this develops. The proceeds of this event will benefit womans breast cancer charities.
The ongoing fly fiction serial "Adventures Of Fletcher Quill" has been too much fun to write and conjure more off the wall escapades for Quill and his little buddy Timba. Stay tuned as these two find themselves chest deep in chaos. This years blessings include the arrival of the famed San Francisco Cartoonist Phil Frank as illustrator for the Fletcher Quill fiction. Im humbled to have such a highly respected artist join Quill and Timba on their insane adventures. Not a bad year all in all, a year full of many extended periods wading the cleanest productive waters I could find. The time spent up at Dunsmuir sampling that now regenerated trophy class fishery was heart tugging. The story "Return To The River Of Tears" has a happy ending as that area has made serious strides toward reclaiming its former glory! My favorite haunts like the mighty Merced River running out of Yosemite and the upper reaches of both the Carson and American Rivers produced unforgettable mornings catching and releasing 15 plus trout. I humbly thank the fly gods for their continued blessings. I thank all of you loyal fans of this monthly column and wish you and your families the very best holiday happiness.
"ADVENTURES OF FLETCHER QUILL"
Fletcher and V.P. Slick Brainy are strapped into the stern of the Egis Class Destroyer that leads the 6-ship battle group accompanying the V.P. on his trip to "Ravens Haven". Quill has successfully talked the number two most powerful man on the planet into activating the ships sophisticated deep sea sonar in hopes of locating schools of giant mutant salmon just off the Irish Coast. They are both holding special deep fly trolling rigs with about 1000 feet of line dropped right on the 100 pound noses of these rarely seen behemoths. They sit in front of the sophisticated Plasma video screens complete with actual under water noise fed through a three thousand watts digital sound system. This wild mega deep sea electronic fly fisher dream set up was the VPs idea designed to impress Quill just in case he wanted to do a bit of trolling
"Fletch, whats up with that girlfriend of yours, we have unconfirmed reports she is cultivating a mess of giant, once extinct Dino type carnivore birds on a deserted island?" "Thats only the half of it, Her and her goofy gal pals are planning to use those little meat eaters to bribe rogue governments into towing the ecological line." Yeah, we been watching her very carefully and I must admit she may have something we might want to use at some point. The Cowboy and I feel letting her complete the experiment could help the cause of world peace at some distant point." "Look, is that the same jet black slightly, beat up Raven that was holding court with Timba this last week?" "Yeah, kind of looks like him, dont it, very weird this bird!" Ok Quill, I have the final list of Middle East peace negotiators we will host on the fly trip. Before I go over the list, it seems almost everyone wants Cindy Garrison to be their guide up at Spent Peacewoods Fall River spread. Hate to hurt your feelings old buddy, but she is the bomb as the kids say. Yeah, yeah, Cindy is the bomb. So what about the diplomat list? Who are these Middle East fly throwers?
"Israeli national hero and I hear a pretty fair deep nympher Sabba Begone and on the opposing team fresh from his bombed-out compound and ready for peace and quiet Lasher Snaracat. Fletch, each of these men have tried on many occasions to arrive at an agreement that would not fall a part quicker than United Airlines stock drops daily! Well set up conference calls to reassure both sides in respect to security up at Peacewoods place." "What the, man I just got the biggest hit on this deep fly rig and Oh yeah! Here we go!" Quill has hooked into a mega strong King Salmon mutant and the destroyer captain is now following the exploding line screaming off the custom reel. "Hold on, Quill. I got to get the photo team down here for this, excellent publicity, dont lose the damn thing!"
Fletcher plays the big King and begins to move him in closer to the ship. "Quill, I have some sad news that came over the wire this morning. Harriet Doerr, that late in life novelist you used to hang with has passed at 92. I hear her total output was only about 600 words, yet she was very highly thought of." "Yeah. I heard that this morning myself, great wordsmith she was, a careful metaphor slinger with real style "
RECORD 150 POUND MUTANT KING SALMON CAUGHT & RELEASED
Quill slowly raises the huge King as the Egis crewmembers circle and capture the event on film. "Damn, Fletcher that has to be some kind of world record! I cant believe Kings exist over 150 pounds and we never heard of them!" "One of the reasons I chose the Northern tip of Ireland and this great old castle is the existence of these mutated beasts. I could never figure how to get deep enough until you and your personal navy showed up" "Wait till the Cowboy hears about this, perfect timing, cant buy this kind of publicity. Were a little worried about two of the guides you chose, Jive Boy and whats his name, Red Rocker? This Jive Boy character has a checkered past, to say the least, and the Rocker guy is a known pot head who hangs out with that maniac Tommy Lee." "Hold your horses, I trust both these with my life. In fact, Jive Boy may be better connected then I m as far as fly-fishing goes and the girls love him. The red Rocker aka "Sammy Quasar" will make this peace fly trip a trip no one will forget. His ability to bring diverse groups together is uncanny. He runs this nightclub down Cabo San Lucas way called Cabo Wabo, every bug thrower worth his salt has hoisted a few of Sammys world famous "Tequila Bombs" buddy. I mean sir, ah." "Quill we have first hand straight skinny you were also in touch with that madman lead guitar player from the Rollin Bones, Keith Snickers. Thank god his schedule is busy, something about his place in Kingston town?"
"Alright maybe old Keith is not exactly a proper date for the Bush twins, but that boy can fly fish better with more delicacy than Oprah commands at the grocery store!" Fletcher, no one in the White House could possibly understand you better then I. It has been a supreme pleasure hanging out at Ravens Haven with you and Timba the last two weeks. Now after watching you play that humungous mutant king and listening to all the tales, I get the picture. Through some sort of distorted time, space black hole portal, you have managed to evade all the rules and do as you please. My hats off to you, Quill, this incredible castle way off the beaten path, your semi legal lucrative rare fly business. The monthly fly column and now International Peace keeper/fly fisher/adventurer? Not a bad world you carved for yourself, not bad at all."
"The Cowboy and I were sitting around the front porch at his Texas Ranch before arrived here and I remember him looking out at the vast dusty nothingness and sharing this thought with me" You know ,one of the best things about this job has to be all the true American characters I have met! That 81 year old that just passed in Highland Park, Michigan, Matel Dawson was his name, known as "The Frugal Philanthropist". He was the son of a groundskeeper and he himself worked for Ford Motors as a lowly forklift operator. The guy gave away a small fortune to charities in his life and left the world a better place. What a character, reminds me of this Fletcher Quill hombre, he walks his own walk with that fly rod under his arm. How the hell can a simple fly fisher get into so much top secret drama?"
(To be continued)
(Next month, the gala pre peace flies trip gala VIP dinner)
Written by Dan
Fallon © 2002
For Dan Fallon's earlier
and later columns; visit the table