Swedish version

Dan Fallon's World of Fly fishing

Column nr. 12 2007  


  San Francisco Ecological Disaster!

  Our beloved Golden Gate Bridge world renowned symbol was not damaged, neither was the much less attractive yet equally important Bay Bridge which was hit by the 65,131 ton container ship Cosco Busan! At 8:30 am Wednesday November7th hard reality woke up my city. Year in and year out container ships navigate our fragile Bay, it is surprising it has taken this long for an accident to occur? At times blinding fog and ripping tides play lethal games with the huge ships full of oil trying to safely enter the Bay under one of the two main bridges. As this story unwinds the blame game is already in session! Many ardent fan’s of the always respected COASTGUARD are now implying their response time is about four hours short of a nice clean reaction/deploy/implementation sequence? Of course it is early in the blame game, in my mind lack of pre planning as in many dry run drills dealing with actual rip tide heavy fog conditions until all hands are squared away would have been my Marine Corps first step!

(As of 11/15/07 local COAST GUARD Commander relieved, major investigations underway.)

  58,000 gallons of heavy fuel oil spilled into a natural Bay already extremely fragile from raw sewage, industrial waste and years of neglect as San Francisco’s population exploded the Bay and it’s resident fish, birds, mammals all suffered. By nightfall many local beaches closed, birds and resident mammals were covered in black goo... It is no secret San Francisco’s natural Bay has been desecrated by man ever since the first explorers landed. Indian tribes recorded so many birds and mammals of all kinds on the Bay one could almost walk across them to the Marin side. As of 2007 man’s nasty by products have choked what’s left of the Bay’s Natural Aqua Sphere and created a shadow of what it once was. Yes, groups are trying to reestablish wet land marsh and yes studies have been done in triplicate. Bottom line this terrible spill in my mind makes my California Coastline just as violated as the thick black slop that pass’s for water in the rivers and streams in underdeveloped countries like China and Africa , India, South America and many others who neglect the price of over population. No question the USA has been one of if not the worst maker and dispenser of pollution world wide period! Now my fellow fly fisher nature lovers, in my once cozy world on the edge of the mighty Pacific Ocean here comes the Judge!

  Very Nasty Stuff

  Heavy bunker fuel oil does not break down, it’s what’s left over after gasoline refining! This awful man made refuge will create chaos for bottom dwelling organisms all the way up the food chain. If all this does not sound bad enough, it appears local Coast Guard has been found lacking in their response timing. At this point no estimate can be made on length of clean up as winds change many miles of California coastline could be effected. Our recovering, thriving Striped Bass will take a hit as they move down the coast late this year. Local surf casters and pier fishers will see and smell the first ugly signs, local crab season opens while party fishing boats get ready for this disaster to play out. Seals, Sea lions, all creatures will pay the cost for our ignorance, greed, over population and dependance on black crude at any cost! (San Francisco Bay Beaches/sfgate.com/zbnm) If the words any cost trouble you? Consider this simple fact Pilgrims, if the tiny besieged country of Tibet had oil under it? My beloved Marine Corps would be all over that once peaceful Shangrala like ants on a dying Frog. Tears and heavy hearts watch ugly reality begin killing innocent creatures above and below the water.

  It is believed our beleaguered Bay was already beyond redemption , as of November 7th 8am San Francisco Bay can now join another fabled California tourist Mecca. My old home Lake Tahoe suffering from recent fires and over building is losing lake water clarity once coveted! Water the new gold in California, water issues will define our future here in the land of milk and honey and world wide as this century unwinds fly fishers, nature lovers Wet Gold will rule!

  Those interested in this quickly developing California wake up call via the web www.sfgate.com

Fair Weather Fly Fisher’s

  Ok Cowgirls and Bronco busting wild wooly outdoors folk who only tip toe into their favorite rivers and streams when the Sun is glistening and azure waters are not too chilly!
Guess what, late Fall early Winter can be a symphony of hot colors, sweet smells, no people...

Of course sitting next to that cozy fire and petting Rex while the endless Flickering Baby Sitter drones on and your once svelte waistline is expanding faster then Brad & Angelina’s international foster family (IFF!) may be best for you? Go on have another Brewski and let that happy go lucky neighbor guy who always seems to find time to drown bugs use your fly gear! Its Ok Poindexter just hand that dam fly rod thingy over and grab that big bag of MM’s, "Honey what was that Oprah was Bioocccching about today Sweet Plums? "

  Tranquil Waters

  In California rivers and streams close in November, fly fishing moves onto lakes and a few streams and rivers open all year. Lake fly fishing never caught my eye though many praise the virtue’s of placid lake bug work. Many large sections of the mighty Sacramento River are open all year and fine Rainbow’s are caught and released. Near world famed Yosemite National Park a small section at El Portel is open year round as are other waters. Waters can be found fellow long rod owners where you can dwell in perfect peace, commune with the natural order while your friends get just a bit wider and more middle aged by the fire...

"Middle age slowly crawled into my favorite chair and now I can’t seem to remove my Derriere"
Mr. Wolf " Wolf can do Haiku"

Royal Yellow Wolf

Hook: Dry Fly Barbless #10-#16 (Or you make it Barbless Cowboy)
Thread: Peacock wrapped around black silk thread taken from old Kimono.
Tail: Wild Sage Hen feathers.
Body: Peacock Herl and red silk thread from old Kimono.
Wings: Yellow carefully sculpted wing feather’s South American Macaw. (Legally obtained of course Pilgrims)
Hackle: Alaskan Wild Wolf hair carefully groomed cut spun on waxed floss. (sent by Alaskan hunter guide.)

**I like very much the international pedagree of this pattern... All of you International Fly Tiers, Attention. Send me any of your extra feathers, wild animal hairs, exotic hair and stuff and I will tie a pattern in your name? Especially if your Blond and awfully hot....


© Phil Frank 2002

Illustrated By Phil Frank,
San Francisco Chronicle Cartoonist, creator of "Farley "

Our two elegantly wasted protagonists, world renowned old school hard rocker Glimmer Twin Keith Richards, wild ass Irish rogue fly tier madman Fletcher Quill are sitting in first class teasing comely high paid waitress’s as they wing towards the northern Irish Coast...

  "Excuse me Sir, a mysterious note for you Mr. Quill"

  "Dear Mr. Quill would you possibly be interested in expanding your position with the Mile High Club? I’m sitting three rows back seat 3A."

  "She looks ready for almost anything there Quilly old man! You have any gas left Mate?"

  "I Laddy, have spent all me Bullets I’m feared... Might be able to fake it one more time. Did you see the Rack on that pretty thang Dude?"

  "Sorry the bother Sir, our Captain would love to have you both come forward ?"

  "All righty then, first Mile High then we hang with Cap...... Dam, I forgot to take extra raincoats Dude! Can’t ask the Stew, man have to pass on this son. No raincoat, no fun!"

The jet goes into a sudden hard dive and drops 3 thousand feet in seconds, chaos and screams fill the cabin as the crew tries to ruffle First Class feathers..... Our heros’ are now laughing and high fiving as the plane struggles to right itself...

  "Dude, this is OK hey. Little shake rattle and roll rocker man. Look here I got three grand that says that fat bitch across from us is about to hurl!"

  "Quilly, cool Obit if this was it hey Mate? Winging to your castle, chasing the Irish Moon."

  "Sir, we are desperately trying to calm everyone down! Would you two international big stars give us a little recital to calm these savage beasts?"

  "Oh yeah, we can do that. Keith how about we jump on, "After Midnight", into "Very superstitious" and wind up with, "Tumbling Dice" One two, one two three, After midnight we going let it all hang out, no cross talking action, we going find out what it is all about! After Midnight going shake your tambourine...."

As the shaky jet moves into Northern Ireland air space equally shaky harmonies and well meaning vocals fill the plane with Irish/ English silliness...

The two hour jeep ride to the tip of a long abandoned jetty where Fletcher Quill’s beloved castle Raven’s Haven covered in grey stone towers reaching over 100 feet stand guard. The long absent master approaches guard dogs first howl then whimper at the sight of six feet two twisted steel and sex appeal long knee length leather coat flapping in the Irish sea breeze...

  "My woman, my cat, my castle, my life.... Sharon where are you?"

  "Timba, Timba!!!! My sweet best friend! (ten thousand slightly sandpapery kiss’s hit Quill’s mug)

  "Just as I imagined you and Timba kiss and hug first before the Ball & Chain hey General?"

  "You look fabulous la Sharon and feel pretty good too. Sooooo you and Ms. No Panties been girl bonding sweets?"

  "She is a kick, up in your fly tower as usual making some crazy thing out of your tying stuff."

  "Excuse me Sir, welcome home Sir, it is the Cowboy I presume? " (President USA Baby!)

  "Howdy Marine, you and that whacked ancient rocker all safe and cozy?"

  "We tore up first class, General Parker and I are ready to roll in five days. We have all secret codes and personal weapons zeroed in. Parker and I will personally lead one of the three prongs that will take the main city. We are ready to be locked and cocked and on the ground by the 12th!"

  "Excellent, now one more thing Marine, you or Parker get whacked going in we need back up Quarter Backs who are savvy to this three prong dealy you two cooked up. Spoke with your main movie star squeeze this morning. She says you have had a Peace Tower built on the grounds?"

"Yes, in a dream an Arch Angel came to me and left plans for the rock tower Peace Temple. It is a replica of the famous California Poet Robinson Jeffer’s tower on the coast."

  "Oh yeah, Slick Brainy and his sidekick Slick Willy say hello and wish you luck."

  "Sharon sweety that reminds me. We will be hosting eight opposing General’s in a think tank session before I commit any more youngsters to this meat grinder. Maybe my guardian Angels will help me sort this mess out before its time to point and shoot!"

  "So honey love how the hell are things here in me castle?"

  "Your stupid Peace Tower is finished and has been blessed by your local Priest."

The prodigal fool and his sweet kitty ajourn to the Fly Tower while La Sharon freshens her Blondness just a taste..... As Quill and his little buddy ascend the spiral staircase leading to the tying room. Quill and his best friend continue the love fest! As the fly tower double heavy wooden doors slowly swing open to reveal our little lost pantyless waif Parris Hilton awfully busy fixing many of the Master’s rare flies to a hot tiny leather mini dress.

  "You must be the one and only Fletcher Quill Sir?"

  "In the flesh my pretty, how goes the locked ankle brigade these days? Not much in the way of trouble here in Raven’s Haven I’m afraid. Only loud Sea Gulls and crashing waves. Do have a tiny pub about twenty-five miles up the coast."

  "Love your silly feathers Mr.Quill" (As Timba brushs past her well turned leg)

  "Dear you must realize these feathers are priceless! The design on that sweet skirt is worth roughly ten thousand. All the scraps and cuttings I see on my floor are worth about the same.That skirt may be the most expensive you have ever owned!"

  "Wonderful, now one or two more of the Peacock eye things and there that will do nicely"

  "Fletcher I must be loosin my mind here, every so often I see or imagine tiny little people with pointy hats and odd clothes scampering around this room? "

  "Yes, they obviously like you or would not allow you to see them. My tiny friends are Fairies who have been with me for many years. They can be mischevious if one upsets! Better be sweet to them and if they do get a bit rambunctious give them pieces of this candy I keep in the top drawer."

  "My God, your not kidding are you! Back in Hollyweird I once parked the new Bently in front of one of my favorite hangs. Around 3am as we crawled in for the ride home I saw little people just like these?"

  "No offence Dear, may have been the rockit fuel you ingested casting surrealistic smack your way?"

"Ahh here is the Mistress of Raven’s Haven, a vision indeed."

  "You two finding common insanity sweet cakes? How about waking up the Glimmer Twin and we start this welcome home party right now! Before that happens, come with me Mr. International Badboy I have some very sserious matters to discuss in the priavtude of our boudour Twisted Steel & Sex Appeal..." (Timba as usual is brushing back and forth on La Sharon’s perfect leg.)

(Castle Games begin -Will three fantastic foursome survive each other?

Read about Fletcher Quill in earlier chapters:

1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11
12 13  14  15  16  17  18  19  20
21 22  23  24  25  26  27  28  29
30 31  32  33  34  35  36  37  38
39 40  41  42  43  44  45  46  47
48  49  50  51  52  53  54  55 
57  58 
59  60  61  62  63  64

Written by Dan Fallon 2007
Illustrations by Phil Frank © 2003
Photos by Dan Fallon © 2007

For Dan Fallon's articles; visit the table of contents


Read Dan Fallons biography and contact info



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