Swedish version

Dan Fallon's World of Fly fishing

Column nr. 4 2011  


Update Ireland & Alaska 2011


  It is a pure pleasure this month on the eve of spring arriving to highlight two special fly fishing venues that never disappoint! Blackwater lodge nestled in Balldof Ireland and a true seasoned Alaskan guide that will take you on a floating, drifting fly adventure of a life time! First an Irish legend in the making has come across my international fly venue Radar. It appears Irish love Angels were involved here? Glenda Powell 33 year old International fly overhead casting Champion and mistress of all that is Black water Lodge one day came across a man named Ian... Next it was the rivers that enchanted and mesmerized. Now Blackwater Lodge hosts fly instructions and Salmon fishing world class all the way! Legend has it Ian did not stand a chance as Glenda and he entered into the sweet light of running a world class fly/Salmon Lodge that caters to woman as much as the gents.

  I could discuss in detail the excellent fly fishing opportunities at this grand Lodge, But, really the tale about Glenda & Ian is much more interesting. Cupid has done his work his best work..... call 058-6035. Balldoff, Ireland. www.blackwaterlodge.com


  Insane All Five Species Alaskan Float Trip For Serious  Dreamer’s!!

Every so often an opportunity comes along truly too good to be real? If you’re a dead serious international world class bug thrower Cowboy? Then saddle up and ride far north until you get to an Hombre’ who goes by the name of Paul Hansen. A fellow who run’s a world class float trip venue that does not skimp on luxury, tents, showers, you name it. This guy has it wired my friend. Sit back and get ready for hit after hit until arms are done and your imagination has bit off maybe more then you can chew! Now, I know this river, have been to mighty Alaska many times.

This river is exteamly productive and full of all five Salmon species. I highly recommend this fly venue as I have spoken with recent clients who are very satisfied. You will be first center row to all the wonderful wild life, birds, you can imagine. This trip is into remote Alaska few have ever experienced. If you have been outside your city limits with a fly rod my friend? This trip is a once in a life time dream come true.......

Contact Paul Hansen, www.goodnewsriver.com or www.akrainbow.com. Phone Toll Free: 877-235-2647. Trips are in July, August 2011. Highly recommended.


By Dan Fallon 2011







© Phil Frank 2002

Illustrated By Phil Frank,
San Francisco Chronicle Cartoonist, creator of "Farley"

"We now turn away from the checkered spectacle of so much Glory and so much shame..."
Lord Macaulay 1800-1859

  As Fletcher Quill prepares for a long fly fishing weekend with his main boys including the now unemployed Dali Lama, General Duke Parker, HD Radio Guru Jimmy Ferguson, and his supreme lowness the now totally disgruntled Black Messiah who has been sitting and fiddling while freedom seeking Libyan’s are being eaten for lunch by the madman Killdafi and his Henchmen.... Suddenly the newly unemployed (He just gave up Political leadership of his people) gets phone call from the Vatican!

"Yoo, Dali Baby, is that your celestial voice flowing into my sacred ear hole?"

  The Catholic guilt riddled leader of the Christian world is seated at Saint Peter’s Basilica slowly masturbating while holding a copy of Timothy Leary’s classic treatise translation of Tao Te Ching.. "Seeing ! I’ve been blind all my life to this radiance."

"Yes, it is I, he who laid down the sword my dear Popeinstein. You called to offer solemn condolences in lieu of my letting my reins of power blow away like Tibetan incense in the morning winds...."

"Ahhh, not exactly, bummer on the power give up thang. I really called to talk about the new solid silver Stripper Pole being installed next to my motherfucking Golden Thrown as we speak Celestial Hashish Dealer (C.H.D.)."

"Tell Quill this Sugar Tit’s and her all female Stripper Pole install crew are smoking hot old Yack Yanker, I mean sweeeet!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

  In the back ground screaming so loudly from the Pope’s stereo one can clearly hear the old Rolling Stone’s classic, "I just want to see his Face !- Don’t want to walk and talk bout Jesus - Just want to see his face." "Pope, your not the least bit curious as to why I gave up and let the heathen Chink’s keep killing and pillaging? I know you’re a for life guy like me, But, Dude your tiny puff a smoke and my ceremony finding the 15th Dali Lama are apples and Hand Grenades Pilgrim! What the fuck, nobody gives a shit?"

  Background music now blaring out of the Pope’s super heavy killer Basilica sound system Bobby Dylan’s rumbling soul bending, "You Gotta Serve Somebody - Might be Jesus - might be Junkie - you gotta serve somebody" Sugar Tit’s wearing an awfully nasty rendition of the red Chex National Flag twisted into a kind of thong which she is now attired in and undulating and watching the conversation between The Dali (Unemployed) Lama and the Pope.....

"Sooo Dali Baby, this Sugar Tit’s that Quill sent me is off the Papal Hookah Son. This girl has her ass and wet swollen pussy (WSP) rubbing up and down my shiny new Pole. Gotta go Dali, nature calls. This is more fun then five corduroy clad 12 year old Alter Boys!!!!"

"Can I give you a Special Chex Oral Dispensation (SCOD) your Holiness. Let the Mean Inch free and if I can find it, I’ll Lewinskie your Holly Ass into a very, very, Happy Ending!!!"

Supream Court Justice Quill is sitting in his personal Marine Helicopter equipped with a fly fishing jet float Boat tied underneath just in case a river, lake, looks too good to resist. The final destination for this four day fly fishing adventure with the now barely speaking Black Messiah who keeps getting phone call’s from General "Mad Dog" Midas’ sitting on an aircraft carrier floating in the hot Arabian Sun.


"Listen boy President, my 3000 1st Marine Divison Heart Breaker Life Takers and me are locked and fucking cocked sitting on this miserable (110' shade!) fucking air craft carrier waiting for you to find your Goddam testicles Sonny Boy! Reach the fuck down in those soaking wet Presidential Panties and make the mother fucking call! We have video of extensive raping and pillaging! This asshole Killdafi is eating his own people like Rice Chrispies. So what the fuck is the great American Freedom Eagle going to do about this Bitch?"

"We are considering all options General, you will be the first to know."

"I know you have two fucking bogus Bullshit war’s, no money in the till and your political future is about as bright as Charlie fucking Scream, But, Son, we, you, me and this fucking Nation can’t stand down and watch Killdafi go berzerrky! Maybe you can live with that Chicago Lexus Salesmen, my associates in the Marine Corps can’t and I sure the fuck can’t!!!"

  As Quill’s Marine Chopper lifts off for Up State New York just outside of Hamburg where a super stealth secret large lake full of fat Rainbow’s hitting Mosquito’s waits patiently. The atmosphere gets tense as the long departed ethereal voice of the most famous living or dead Marine his honor Chesty Puller holder owner of Nine Navy Cross’s and a chest full of hard earned medal speaks...

  CHESTY PULLER UNITED STATES MARINE "Lets take a breath boys before the Doghouse is let loose here. Quill, you and my favorite living Marine Mad Dog Midas are both right here Son. One thing can’t be FUCKING argued here boys! If this Country is prepared to let a mass slaughter, rape, continue like this? Then better dismantle my beloved Corps and send the boys home to work it out on their own! Or get on your Mother Fucking feet Boy President and let the Dogs run Now!!!!!!"

"General Puller, when other Sand Nation’s wake up and want this fool’s ass kicked! I promise to lob a few hundred drones and maybe let the fucking French Frog Pilots go Postal! We won’t go after him alone, Sand people will freak. Killdafi is going down swinging Boys, no fucking question. Sooo, we need another mother fucking shoot out in Arab land, don’t think so!!!!"

  Quill’s Marine Chopper is in sight of the remote Rainbow trout filled lake. He and his boys suit up and string the fly rods. Quill hands out his killer Uber Mosquito’s as the Chopper lands without the engine silently. The lake is cooking with rising fat wild Trout everywhere.... Socialist States Of America bidness must wait!!!!

Jimmy HD Radio Phenom has with the hands of fate and her sisters created the most insane four way satellite cell phone hook up the world has ever heard. The now Stripper Pole equipped nastiest of all religious little boy lovin Pope his dam self, the now eternally unemployed, annoyed, man God Supreme 14th Dali Lama, and his absolute newly ordained Bad Boy Hombre’ number One Charles ( Tiger Blood ! ) Screaming Sheen!, and Justice Quill.......


"Quill this is so fucking Charlie Dude, you me and the two most revered Stoner to the Boner man Gods shooting the celestial Bullshit while you catch & release fat trout..."

"Yes Charles, it tis I Pope completely ripped on ths killer Moroccan Hashish Dali had UPS drop on my robed lap. This shit is soo fucking head trippy Dali, what’s up with your now unemployed status Mountain Man God?"

"We must not ignore the current leader in the race for center stage in Hell, Mr. I eat more pussy then any man ever seen (Thanks Jimmy Morrison). Soo our mutual Pal Dennis Hof the worlds Super Pimp who owns the www.bunnyranch.com Whore House’s in Vegas. Tells me he fucking fired one of your Hoe Girlfriends for partying too hard? Is that right my Son?"

"I ain’t your Son old Man, how do I get on your Hashish gift supply list. I’m hitting a major Bong Bowl of that shit you sent, fucking fabulous hey Quill?"

"I been inhaling that shit for months Mr. Bad Boy. You and your street Cred would look better on www.facefuckbook.com and www.Matchyourballs.com if you went line for line, Bong Bowl for mother fucking Bowl with me and Keith Richards next weekend Mr. Wannbe a tough guy Hollywoody?"

"Yeah, I know you and Keith are the fucking real fucking deal in the Bad Boy Run For Hell Sweepstakes (BBRFHS!), I bow to you Boys every fucking time I pull out of one of these over paid slut’s I’m banging 24r/7..."

"Ahh, Dali unemployed Holy Tripper, so why not go on my killer " Torpedo The Truth Tour Holy Dude. We hit LA, and do Quill’s old crib San Francisco, what do you say Holy Stoner?"

"Will think about it Charles, what about what’s left of your soul young man. Maybe I can arrange a Meet & Greet with the Dark Prince his Dam self or Quill can hook you up with his main dead Bad Boy ole 666, hey Justassss Quillly Bongggggggggg!!!"

"Dam, Man God trippin, warning, Man God goes blizzzzrady...... 666 will take care of you Chucky Baby! I’LL put out the howl for his sulfur smelly ass now!!"

(Holy Men unraveling and sliding down the Eternal Stripper Pole???


Read about Fletcher Quill in earlier chapters:

1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11
12 13  14  15  16  17  18  19  20
21 22  23  24  25  26  27  28  29
30 31  32  33  34  35  36  37  38
39 40  41  42  43  44  45  46  47
48  49  50  51  52  53  54  55  56
57  58  59  60  61  62  63  64  65
66  67  68  69  70  71  72  73  74
75  76  77  78  79  80  81  82  83
84  85  86  87  88  89  90  91  92
93  94  95  96  97  98  99  100  101
102  103 104


Written by Dan Fallon 2011
Illustrations by Phil Frank © 2003
Photos by Dan Fallon © 2011

For Dan Fallon's earlier and later columns;
visit the
table of contents



Read Dan Fallons biography and contact info



To get the best experience of the Magazine it is important that you have the right settings
Here are my recommended settings

Please respect the copyright regulations and do not copy any materials from this or any other of the pages in the Rackelhanen Flyfishing Magazine.

© Mats Sjöstrand 2011

If you have any comments or questions about the Magazine, feel free to contact me.

Mats Sjöstrand

Please excuse me if you find misspelled words or any other grammatical errors.
I will be grateful if you contact
me about the errors you find.