|Column nr. 8 2010|
AMAZON STREET FIGHTER’S
Those fortunate fly fishers and accomplished top water specialists who have adventured upon the majestic Amazon River are haunted by the voracious explosive first slam of the fabled Peacock Bass! Colorful like the native Parrots and Macaws that glide and scream feeding on endless insect hatches.These street fighters are dead serious when they annihilate your top water offering and yank your arm out its socket! Sensory symphony invades your mind as Howler Monkeys and smaller primates Squirrel Monkeys fly through the trees screeching keeping you engaged fully. His highness Mr. Peacock defends his watertory with vigor, you are in his house.
Hypnotic lagoons small streams and creeks are home to abundant game fish, no time to relax fly fishing the Amazon. Your host Terry Jertburg Captain of a 70 foot luxury floating fishing vessel will keep you focused and comfortable. Terry has many years of Amazon experience and his new fishing boat make the adventure truly world class. Looking for the ideal family fly adventure is difficult in these insane economic times. Tough to beat a trip to South America and a week on the meandering Amazon at a modest price?
It is unusual to access a true exotic world class (words used too often?) fly fishing family adventure in these sobering economic times. Focusing on just the Amazon River aspect of this adventure would take volumes. Nature lovers, bird watchers, amateur wanna-be green house experts can learn plying this meandering legendary river. Monkeys of all kinds including Howler’s and the ubiquitous Squirrel monkey fly through the shadow strewn tree canopy. Macaw’s and many kinds of Parrots and other birds abound. When I consider family fly adventures this trip is near the top for the variety of experiences including one on one with a wild Bass that considers the river his private house, no trespassing!
HIGH ROLLER OUTDOOR ADVENTURES
Captain Terry Jertberg your host will make sure your needs are met while his 70 foot luxury hotel on the river provides a perfect base camp. Terry knows the river well, many creeks, streams and secret magic lagoons are on his itinerary. He and his crew know exactly where the street fighters dwell and how to entice them with top water offerings. Fly fishers get ready for wrist twisting action no question. Your family will be educated by endless stories and real natural history as the fishing floating hotel searches for the mighty Peacock Bass. Nature lovers, bird watchers and amateur wanna-be green house experts will be satisfied. Contact: www.highrolleroutdooradventures.com
"ADVENTURES OF FLETCHER QUILL"
"J’aime la majesty des souffrances humaines..
Supreme Court new guy, retired Marine General, X Secretary Of The friggin Interior, fly tying master, global assassin, hard partying blues harp playing psychedelic munching San Francisco madman Fletcher Quill and his best dead and alive buddies are still on stage at the Fillmore West after hours..... Quill’s new best friend the leader of what’s left of the almost free world is recovering from a serious one on one with the King Of Beasts and lost! Secret Service boys are stoked at the idea of maybe a whole month deep in the Yosemite National Park deep woods. The new President needs time to heal, Quill and his team need time to play, works out just dandy. Quill is just finishing a medley of early Muddy Waters, John Lee hooker classics including rare gems, "I’m a Crawling King Snake" "Hoochie Coochie Man" "Long Distance Call" "Honey Bee" "Boom Boom" "Shake It Baby" "You Know & I know" and Quill’s killer rendition ala key of g blues harp ‘ Big legs tight skirts ‘... Ghosts of Bill Graham, Jerry Garcia, Pigpen, Jim Morrison come and go all night taking turns backing up Quill’s lead vocal attempts! Emergency cell call from none other then the oldest dearest boyhood Frisco Pally, Detective Gary (Hardball!!) Hunter.
"Fletcher, listen Cowboy I got someone from La La land wants your ear pronto! It’s Mad Max Baby, Melvin (I fucking hate them ALLLL !!!!) Gibson. Your both on speaker phone, go.
"Fletcher Quill Justice Quill been watching and reading bout your dumb ass potato famine Mick ass for years. I know you been listening to the fucking tapes being released by that dumb ass simple two faced cunt bitch from Rosskis land."
"Mad Max rides again Melvin, didn’t you learn with the Sugar tits cop episode Mr. Bollywood money bags?"
"That fucking roust job, another goddam bitch jew cum dumpster getting my fucking way hey Quill. I gave this latest flame a facial reconstruction job sonny boy, several teeth and..."
"Hold it right there you little short assed punk motherfucker from down under! I ain’t Danny fucking Glover and this ain’t one of your shit movies dipshit. You hit woman and have no control over what escapes out of that demented sick pie hole. DO NOT ever contact me again."
"Detective Hunter, love you my old friend for letting Melvin vent in my ear hole. One sick tax evader Pilgrim."
"Listen Quill give your HD Radio man Jimmy Ferguson a buzz and see if this Black Messiah thing has crawled under his door yet?"
"Hey Jimmy, you still waiting at the Oyster Bar down at Fishermen’s Wharf radio Zar?"
"Oh Yeah, sampling all your local seafood, what’s up?"
"Got little situation with our beloved boy leader, can’t give details other then you please keep it down low until we get his ass deep into the Yosemite Park back country in three days. He is at the Farm right now with Nurse Caron’s crew. One more thang can you bring two gallons of that killer K.C. Barbecue your famous for!"
"Done Justice Madman, hey Dude this Mel Gibson thing is getting huge, it will keep your ass out of the news stoner.Your new Supreme Court Pal’s are celebrating the new vanilla nice bitch from Harvard yard. She will DO as told no question. Think she is Canyon Yodeler like the other bitches. Quite a crew Quill, when court starts in October it looks like back alley fist fight with your old ass against the wall. Soo I’m sending you this tape I just got of the two new Supremes as I call them double teaming Fat Bot Tony Scalia on his Yacht last weekend. They did pass the right for every swinging American dick to carry a gun. My boys back in Kansas city love the shit out o that!"
"You always know what’s poppin Mr. Radio, now that you samplafied the local sea food you can crash at my Sea Cliff estate. I have my on air San Fran legends Lamont & Tenneli & Sully & Baby Huey & Big Head (Bunny Ranch) Jake who rule 107.7 The Bone waiting to hang with the HD Radio Guru, see ya soon big guy!"
The most disgusting, abhorrent, deviate populated parade in the world occurs in San Francisco every year called "Gay Pride Parade" Celebrating taking over an innocent city, infecting it with a killer fatal disease and then celebrating by dancing naked in front of kids, families. A sickening sad spectacle that makes native San Franciscan’s physically ill. Quill can hardly wait for so-called gay rights issues to reach his new home the Supreme Court. No matter where Justice Quill roams, not one city has ever experienced such a retched infestation of the very dregs of a modern overly tolerant ignorant society.
"Quill It’s Keith Richards Dude,fucking faggot lover Mick the stick is in town for your fag parade. How bout we meet you at your Sea Cliff digs? You have any Graftsganistani Hashish left Pilgrim? Fucking Mel Gibson took Tiger off the front page didn’t he Dude?"
"Man, that fucking degenerate tribute parade makes every San Francisco native physically ill and ashamed the world equates an infestation of abhorrent degenerate slime to dominate a traditionally overly tolerant west coast jewel city. Bare assed leather clad deviates parade every year man. Anywho look glimmer twin heard the whole "Exile On Main street" redo with killer Mick Taylor doing it! Lets meet out at my Sea Cliff digs Dude, lots to talk about, especially fucking dumb ass Mel (Mad Max, my ass!) Gibson."
THE FARM WEST COAST MEDICAL MECCA?
"Justice Heart On, listen Mr. San Francisco bad boy your running dawg has picked up a couple of our resident bad news staff infections thanks to the always unventilated closed window policy. We have him on a steady drip of every antibiotic known to man! In 24 hours he may be either well enough to be air lifted to your deep north Yosemite woods fly fishing gig or he goes straight to Intensive Care, not sure yet, no temperature yet, keep you posted, have two other very sick patients to tend to, by. Oh yeah Nurse Jerry (resident deviate!) will be in touch."
"Thank you so much Nurse Caron, your country thanks you, your lover boy thanks you and as an added bonus you get to hand hold the First Lady sweet cakes. Gotta bounce, when he is clear to air lift buzz me baby. I have Supreme Court Bullshit to attend to as well fat Boy Scalia kissed my Irish Marine General ass with his vote to support " Right to Bear Arms " may have to cut him some modicum of slack, listen cruse by Sea Cliff when your 12 hour shift ends for a little TLC Ms. 36 D, you hear me?"
"Dream on nasty old man, don’t hold that evil breath, maybe..."
Justice Quill decides after putting in his precious GreatFull Dead Live At The Avalon Ball Room 1969 Bootleg featuring a one hour rendition of "Casey Jones" into his ten thousand dollar killer F1 Ferrari Digital HDCD player. Without warning the red rocket car pulls a hard left turn down Fillmore Street and heads for the haunted Height Ashbury one time residence of the very undead Dead…
"Man, oh man, when fucking Hunter handed me that song " Casey Jones ‘ it just smelled Dead to me at first read. Loved to play that with the boys especially Bobby doing harmonics. Those were the good old days when Bill Graham ran everything except us! Told that Nazi hating Jew we would never become one of his slave acts. Soo what happens he takes care of us any way and till the end mutual respect ruled the days and nights at Fillmore West, west is still the friggin best! Whole bunch of us long dead Frisco hippies are highly pissed at the boy mayor trying to kill the old Haight Ashbury district. Think its time to change his energy again, get his punk ass back in tune Quill. I’ll get you a piece of whatever plot we come up with, been hanging with your fairy underground Abbott 666. He thinks its time for you begin working your mojo Can’t get my Dead head around the disintegration of the old real San Francisco by ass bites like the Board of Stupidvisors & the boy mayor. Maybe you can Honcho a series of blues rock benefits to help fight this insidious bullshit conservative disease Frisco Dark Prince?"
"Little busy with the Supreme Court thang rock god, but, will find time to throw something together. Listen I’m outside your old house in the Haight Asbury, where did you stash your emergency Killer Weed back up supply? Wasn’t it under the big Oak tree?"
"No way, too many tourists could find our ballistic bud buddy! I put it in the hollowed out squirrel hole about twenty feet up, got a climb ancient hippy."
"Found it nine fingered phenom, oh yeah the kind! Thanks man we are almost out of the Grafganistany Hashish. Our fearless leader needs more medicating then your old band mates."
"Oh yeah, one more bit of very Dead bizz Quill. All your long time dead Recon Marine buddies are waiting for you to make a statement on the General Mc Crystal dismissal Pilgrim! We know for a fact that him and his puppet string pulling asshole Pal Bite me VP Biden ( lied in public professing to be a Vietnam Vet - never served ? ) were totally intimidated by General Mac when he came to visit the Black House. Kinda shows in my Dinosaur Dead rocker logic hardrive cowardice and separating jive talking Chicago blow hard boy politicians from real American men. Time for you to speak the fuck up Frisco Dark Prince."
"Have already talked to Stanley, his record speaks loud enough. Both the new boy president and his cowardly number two know in their hearts where the fucking line is drawn in the man sand my friend. I don’t have to say or do much more."
CHESTY PULLER (Most famous dead or alive Marine)
"Get on your feet Marine, stand at ease and listen with both ear holes as this is coming from not only me Jarhead, but, all of your still insane Dead Recon Brother’s have voiced the same mind set! You have yet to make a definitive Marine fucking combat General statement in total support of Stanley Mc Crystal? You were a Honor Marine before those two Bullshit Courts Martials...Point here is clear Quill, Stanley is made of your stuff and mine and my dear son who gave more then I did. Your Boy fearless leader and Joseph (Lied in public speech- was a Vietnam Vet- Had not ever served?) Bite-me Biden both seriously way over their punk ass heads and fucking draft dodger material, you get my fucking drift Frisco bad boy?"
"I’m all over it Chesty, have spoken with Stanley three times and will make many wild ass public statements after I get the boy pres healed on this Yosemite fly fishing trip. Semper Fi my best to your Heroic son."
"This 3rd class Bullshit conflict is wonderful for the legends being made by new Marines! Thing is Jarhead, it’s another of the ongoing " We have no real reason or logic for being there, period" shoot outs wasting precious blood and booty for nothing, nothing at all except maybe oil and bragging rights? Through out warrior history these countries have never been tamed or civilized and unless Nukes are used. It’s a big ugly corrupt fucking sink hole like Nam. You General Quill spilt your blood and still walk the walk, cover Stanley’s ass and watch your back, your new Supreme Court bunk mates are treacherous back stabbers waiting for fresh meat."
(Yosemite deep North coming up or Black Messiah explodes in the world media?)
Read about Fletcher Quill in earlier chapters:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11
Written by Dan Fallon © 2010
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